Donald Trump Is Galactically Angry at Nikki Haley for the Funniest Reason


Donald Trump celebrated winning the New Hampshire primary in his signature style: a series of deluded ravings. But connoisseurs of the former president’s rants were treated to an unexpected dollop of irony last night, as Trump came out against the losers of elections laying claim to victory.

Trump was the victor Tuesday night, winning the Granite State’s Republican primary with 54.5 percent of the vote. Nikki Haley came second, but her 43.2 percent support was far higher than anyone initially expected—a fact she celebrated as she promised supporters she would keep pushing.

Haley’s resilience immediately infuriated Trump, who turned his victory speech into a Haley roast. “I find in life, you can’t let people get away with bullshit,” he said, flanked by the nightmare blunt rotation of Vivek Ramaswamy, Tim Scott, and Eric Trump.

“And when I watched her in the fancy dress—that probably wasn’t so fancy—come up, I said, ‘What’s she doing? We won.’ And she did the same thing last week,” Trump said, referring to Haley celebrating after coming third in Iowa.

Having failed to fully purge himself of his excess emotions during his speech, Trump then took his grievances to social media, at one point writing on Truth Social, “Could somebody please explain to Nikki Haley that she lost—and lost really badly. She also lost Iowa, BIG, last week.”

It’s pretty rich for Trump to say that people who lose should just accept their loss. After all, he has been indicted twice, once at the federal level and once at the state, for failing to accept a loss so hard that he tried to overturn the 2020 presidential election.

Trump also suddenly seemed to become clairvoyant and declared himself the winner of the Nevada caucus, which doesn’t take place until next week.

“SHE JUST LOST NEVADA, WHICH IS UP NEXT!” he wrote. “WE JUST WON NEVADA!”

For the most part, Trump spent the rest of the night blasting his Truth Social followers with dozens of news clips talking about how he had swept to victory. At one point, he bragged that he “BROKE THE ALL-TIME RECORD FOR VOTES CAST—BOTH SIDES, DEMOCRAT AND REPUBLICAN—IN THE HISTORY OF THE NEW HAMPSHIRE PRIMARY!”

This isn’t quite accurate. Voter turnout for the Republican primary did hit a record high, with more than 300,000 people showing up to vote. But Trump performed poorly among moderates, non-affiliated voters, and younger voters.

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